How to win elections and intimidate people

Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe may not have written the book yet on electoral manipulation, but its fundamental precepts are well-known all over Africa and other parts of the world that are afflicted by, and so easily succumb to, dictatorial rule.

And just like the blurb on the bestselling Dale Carnegie book, Mugabe knows: How to go after the election you want…and win it! Take the dictatorship you have…and make it more brutal! Take any situation you’re in…and make it seem like the fault of white colonialism!

It’s no surprise to learn therefore that:

After conducting an audit of the [electoral] roll, the ZESN [Zimbabwe Election Support Network] reported that 27% of people registered to vote were dead.

The computer test revealed that 2 344 people born between 1901 and 1909, therefore aged between 101 and 110 years, were on the voters’ roll.

Nine people born between 1890 and 1900, aged between 111 and 120 years, are registered voters.

The ZESN report found that 41% of voters had moved without updating their details

About 52% of men were registered, compared with 48% of women. This is unusual considering there are more women in the country than men.

Young people were underrepresented, with only 18% registered.

I don’t how the ZESN managed to painstakingly collate all this information, considering that the ZANY-PF government “maintained only paper editions of the [voters’] register,” but it makes for frightening reading.

It makes one wonder what sort of machinations the incumbent SA-government are up to, ahead of local government elections, and national elections scheduled for next year. With their penchant for dipping their fingers regularly in the public cooky jar, their love for power and the determination to keep it all costs,  crooking the books is not beyond them either…and yes, they’re very chummy with one Robert Gabriel Mugabe, to boot.