2014 = 205

Darwin Day

No, 2014 does not equal to 205. It’s just that this year and specifically this day, is the 205th anniversary of the birth of Charles Darwin.

The 12th of February is celebrated in mostly scientific and humanist circles as Darwin Day. Why humanist? Well that’s a long story; ask any fundamentalist Creationist. Don’t know any? Good for you.

Amazingly since the publication of his seminal work On the Origins of Species by Means of Natural Selection, or the Preservation of Favoured Races in the Struggle for Life in 1859, Charles Darwin has been both vilified and praised, and continues to be the subject of misinformation and abject lies. Fortunately modern science is slowly tearing apart the veil of ignorance and mischief that has plagued the Theory of Evolution originally postulated by Darwin and refined by others.

You will find a brief history of the origins of Darwin Day here.

darwin day

Darwin Award

And on a somewhat lighter note… The Darwin Awards has nothing whatsoever to do with Charles Darwin, although had he be still been alive, I’m pretty certain he would appreciate the humour.

The Darwin Awards were dreamed up by people on USENET groups, a precursor to modern Internet Newsgroups or Forums. The idea was to award individuals who through an act of sheer stupidity eliminated themselves (usually permanently) from the human gene pool.

It’s therefore fitting that just two days prior to Darwin Day, a member of the human species (debatable really) was involved in what I would call an act of premature disintegration, boldly announced his candidacy for a Darwin Award with a bang.

If this report in an Israeli publication is true (note that I haven’t read it anywhere else), then the Iraqi suicide bomb instructor who during a training exercise blew himself and 21 of his students up, is a winner by miles. Unfortunately the 21 students, will just have to be satisfied with being a piece of history.

Public disservice announcement for ambitious jihardiots

So you’re just not satisfied with blowing up the odd offending building or bus, anymore? Yeah that just does not cut it these days. The message is really not sinking in. People are just so goddamn stubborn, and simply will not accept the last true faith willingly. What you need is to ramp it up a bit – or perhaps a whole lot.

Yeah! Being blown up into 72 pieces is just not enough. What is required is more pieces and for that you need a bigger bang. Nuclear big!

Well you’re in luck because graphic designer Maximilian Bode has performed the complex calculations to enable you to determine the minimum number of nuclear devices necessary to blow up a whole city, a whole state or province, even the whole world. Because, let’s face it – nothing short of total Armageddon is going to make the infidels sit up and listen. Even if it may be rather difficult sitting up and listening in such a state of bodily separation.

Depending on the size of the device you deviously manage to get your hands on, it would take between 19 (Little Boy used in WW2) and 1 (B53 or Castle Bravo or Tzar Bomba modern-day device), to obliterate New York for instance. You need only be limited by your level of ambition, and capacity to satisfy hordes of virgins.

Off course securing the nuclear fuel for these delightful death devices may be a little tricky, but if you can worm your way into the good books of certain South African politicians who happen to also be senior members of the African Nuclear Commission (ANC), you may be able to secure what you need. All it takes is money, or a car or house or Breitling watch. But it also doesn’t hurt to first secure the services of a middle man, and South Africa has quite a few disgraced former Police Commissioners and assorted suspended “leaders” who will be quite happy to assist you, having had plenty experience in securing stuff.

So I’ll leave you to it then. Go fetch.