State Of The Nation Dress

While many politicians were today attending the State of the Nation Address (SONA) by President Jacob Zuma in Parliament, I’d venture that a whole lot more astute South Africans decided to give it a total miss.

Why anyone other than journalists unlucky enough to get this pissy assignment, politicians and economist types would want to watch this drivel, is beyond me. I do know that quite a few people I’m acquainted with would have watched if only Zuma would have used the occasion to say, “You were all right. I’m a poor excuse for a leader. I quit.” But we all knew that was never going to happen.

From the newspaper reports, SONA did live up to expectations: another drab, meaningless affair crammed full of rhetoric and promises drifting on a stream of hot air spewing from the President’s untrustworthy mouth. He could have rehashed any previous SONA, and only the most discerning would have detected any difference.

However what interested me the most was the outfits these politicians chose to wear to Parliament. It smacked of pretentiousness.

While many chose traditional African outfits, one even came barefoot. Another MP’s wife arrived clad in a blue, red, yellow, and black Ndebele blanket, claiming that it was her culture. Perhaps her culture is only manifest at Parliamentary shindigs, because I’m willing to bet that you will find her dressed in European haute couture, the rest of the year. One female MP bought her traditional dress in Ghana because it symbolized freedom. Seemingly there are no South African equivalents.

Julius Malema of the infamous Economic Freedom Fighters attended in a red workman’s overalls, which has become his party’s dress of choice for Parliament because it symbolizes their (supposed) affiliation to the working class. The idiom “a jackass wolf in sheep’s clothing” has never been more relevant. But that was not all: an observant journalist noticed that Malema was wearing a normal suite under these red overalls. You can be sure that those red digs will be ripped off like a stripper does, just before the SONA after-party, safely out of sight of his doting, but gullible constituents.

Then off course there were the others, whose fashion sense were about as deficient as their honest political intentions.

And so concludes my report on another hollow State of the Nation Address.

Essential Voter Information

The South African General Elections are mere days away now, and your political parties are canvassing up a storm, regurgitating many old promises, and inventing enticing new ones.

Mostly outrageous lies off course. But you know that, right? Right?

These are the ones making the most noise, yes, noise…

The incumbent African National Congress (ANC), are handing out t-shirts and food parcels, just in case the promises aren’t inventive enough, or the people can’t hear through the ullulating women and men’s chants of Viva. All knowledgeable know that they’re merely digging in for another five years of brazen theft, incompetence and cronyism. The Economic Freedom Fighters (EFF) are promising Nationalization of the land and sea, and just about anything stupid that comes on the spur of the moment to bloated heads. If they promise the air as well, then that will complete the Nationalization trifecta. Their leader Julius Malema is… the embodiment of a buffoon and wants nothing more than to lord it over like the ANC does.

And the purported voice of reason…

The Democratic Alliance (DA) are preaching to a small choir, because almost nobody else understands reason and logic, or trusts them. The new kids on the block, Agang, are mostly mimicking the DA, and essentially clueless about policy, but do have a woman leader who would make the perfect President.

No other party (and there are lots) matters. It seems that for every half-baked ideology, there’s a political party crusading it.They’re all worthless shit. That’s not to say that those above are not shite as well. But you just have to remember one thing.

This.

Vote wisely folks. After the 7th of May, these politicians will all crawl back under their steaming piles of horse shit, and you’ll be left wandering a trail of broken promises for another 5 years.

See you at the polls…

EFF: #ProudlyBroughtToYouByTheANC

Julius Malema, former Reichsmarschall of the ANC Youth League launched his own political party at Marikana this weekend, where he was anointed as Commander In Chief.

The EFF was formed a little earlier, probably as an afterthought in the depths of political hell when Malema fell out with Jacob Zuma and the ANC, after losing most of his ill-gained wealth and the patronage of the deservedly despised President.

And so we have one more party to contest the elections next year. This now brings the grand total of political party’s in South Africa to “blimey! that fucking many?” [230 by this official count]

You might think that having this many political party’s is indicative of a healthy democracy. And you might be dead wrong. It’s not healthy, it’s fucking insane! Democracy has become a useful plaything, a vehicle for the politicians to hitch their self-serving wagons to – it’s just something that sounds nice to mostly ignorant people. And oh boy, do we have ignorant people?

And that is why the EFF is being embraced by so many people; not a lot, but a small fart’s worth. People are emotional and desperate, and unfortunately the EFF’s cringe-worthy offerings resonates well with them.

You see, all the party’s offer different shades of the same things. Yes, they offer, but the reality is they never make good on those offers. Not a single one of them. Oh agreed, they do manage to achieve bits and pieces, but never is any pre-election promise honoured in its entirety.

But the EFF promises something totally different; not good, just different. Actually they’re promising to drag South Africa back to pre-colonial times; to a parallel Dark Ages if you like. And render South Africa a pariah, like Zimbabwe.

Among other distasteful policies, the EFF promises to nationalize key sectors of the economy such as mines, and confiscate privately owned land from Whites without compensation. Their manifesto describes them as a “radical, leftist, anticapitalist and anti-imperialist movement.” That’s so retarded, it’s straight out of a dictator’s manual.

Now that’s some scary shit.

South Africa’s only redemption is that the EFF is unlikely to make a big enough dent in the elections next year, let alone win… for the simple unsavoury fact that the voting fodder will with fair certainty still cling to the devil they know, the ANC.

Are we in the Twilight Zone?

Earlier this week a guy in Greece was arrested and charged with blasphemy for lampooning on his Facebook page, a dead cleric who belonged to the Greek Orthodox Church.

The details of his act are unimportant, but the response to it is. It is patently absurd that there are still laws governing the archaic concept of blasphemy, and that it is actually punishable under so-called civilized penal codes around the world.

Meanwhile in Pakistan

In the same week a Christian teenager from Islamabad who was accused of blasphemy, was reported to have had her case referred to a Juvenile Court. She is accused of tearing pages out of a “holy book.” Had the case not been transferred to the lower court, she was under threat of being executed, under strict Pakistani law.

There are several disturbing aspects to this case, apart from the absurdity of blasphemy laws. The girl was apparently mentally challenged and a minor to boot. One of her main accusers, a Muslim cleric was found by the police to have planted the evidence (torn pages from a holy book) on her person and has yet to be dealt with properly. But still the minor girl’s prosecution continues, albeit in a Juvenile court.

We really need to ask ourselves why a so-called holy book should be regarded with more deference than the life of a human being. Have we reached the height of civilization and are we on the downward spiral? Or are we in the fabled twilight zone? Think that’s too extreme? Hang around for a bit…

The results of poor film-making

Protests around the world are still continuing over the making of a film by a few Americans that is deemed to be insulting to Islam’s prophet, Muhammad. The protests in certain parts of the world have resulted in the deaths of dozens of innocent people. I could provide the link here to an excerpt of the film posted on YouTube but it’s really not worth wasting time over. It’s a sloppy piece of drama, and is not really important. What is important is the reactions to it, which are irrational, and absurd in the extreme.

Can you really imagine an all-powerful deity (were he or she to exist off course) who would be so pitifully impotent as to rely on puny humans to protect his or her dignity? You do? Why are you worshipping such an abomination?

Apart from the often violent protests, people have tried to engage in (reasonably) peaceful debate over the whole incident, but once again, it only managed to degenerate into pathetic calls for censorship and special protections to be applied to religions. Take this guy for example who wrote a blog not only appealing for the censorship of blasphemy, but tried to disingenuously condone the violence that such blasphemy provokes with consummate ease.

Still think the world is normal?

Dancing in Afghanistan deadly too

Towards the end of last month, the Taliban in Afghanistan (yeah, unfortunately  these retarded troglodytes still pollute the earth) beheaded 15 men and two women for the “crime” of dancing together at a party. Shock! Horror! Men and women together… at a party? What were they thinking?

You may be thinking that this is a quaint custom peculiar to Afghanistan only, and we should overlook this isolated incident? No, no no. Religions the world over condemn men and women to death, sometimes for acts that are far less innocuous.

And lest you be thinking that I have singled out Islam for special attention, that was not my intention. It’s just coincidental that this religion is involved in a high number of unsavory acts which are grabbing the attention of the world at this moment in time. I am quite convinced that religiots of other persuasions are quietly getting on with the job of damning mankind all over the world. And it’s not a good thing when it’s hidden from scrutiny.

And so we come to the evil twin

Enough about religion. Let’s not forget about the antics of politicians, and their brand of politics that make one wonder if the world has gone crazy. Politics is the evil twin of religion. Don’t believe me?

I could bore you with acts of political incongruity around the world right now, but I think you could easily think of many – the killings in Syria by Assad’s regime, conflicts all over Africa, despots who still rule with impunity, the farcical election politics in the USA between the Democrats and the Republicans. There is much civil unrest at various locations in the world right now, all motivated by some form of politics.

But, I want to look closer to home, to South Africa.

The ruling party here is at war with itself. Factionalism and greed is tearing a once honourable organization apart. The ANC has succumbed to the same despicable acts which they once fought against. I suppose it was inevitable.

Julius Malema a former youth leader expelled from the ANC, is fighting corruption charges, including tax evasion. He still enjoys the support of a fairly large number of people, politicians included, some of whom dance and sing outside the courtroom, and hold night vigils for him. Is it normal for civilized people to support unquestioningly, a person of such character?

But here’s an even bigger absurdity. The President, Jacob Zuma, a semi-literate, scandal-plagued, patriarchal degenerate, is honoured by the United Nations by being appointed to their Education Panel. This honour could not have gone to a more undeserving person. In a country where the education system is barely functional, mostly due to the mal-administration of the Ministry by a woman personally appointed by Zuma, is a grievous insult to the many schoolchildren who have been affected so severely.

So, I hope you’ll forgive me for thinking that we’ve either crossed over into the Twilight Zone, or are slipping down the slope of de-civilisation.

More on Motshekga

I have written previously about this vile woman, but it seems she is not quite done yet with her acts of unbelievable stupidity…

Angie Motshekga, Minister of Basic Education continues to baffle us all with the levels of depravity, incompetence and utter idiocy she is capable off achieving. In the month of August which South Africa has dedicated to honouring woman, she has chosen to show the world that she can be the worst possible example to humanity, let alone womanhood.

Motshekga is all set to contest NGO Equal Education’s application to the High Court forcing her to promulgate legislation that sets out norms and standards for school infrastructure, which will both compel and hold the government accountable to meet those standards. Apparently she intends using the ludicrous defense that the Constitution does not guarantee children the right to basic education, and that both the budget and resources are inadequate.

That is utterly absurd if you put it in context against the recent (undeserved) 5% salary hike that the government awarded itself, and the fact that they are spending billions where it is least needed. Not to mention the shambolic manner in which her Ministry is being run; what with textbooks being undelivered more than 6 months into the school year, ghost teachers on the payroll and various other forms of maladministration that characterize the Education portfolio. Then there’s the rampant corruption all arms of government are  contentedly engaged in, with the un-mistaken approval of the ANC-government leadership.  Should we even mention, the government’s partner-in-mismanagement, labour union SADTU’s role in destroying education in South Africa?

Wikipedia

Motshekga seems not only determined to follow through on this path of ignominy she has set for herself, she is arrogant beyond measure about sticking it out in spite of the howls of protest from all quarters. It seems that she is hell-bent on competing with President Jacob Zuma and Julius Malema for the title of scumbag of the decade.

But the most baffling thing about this whole saga is the seeming disinterest and apathy from the majority of the Black population whose children are most affected. The same people very quickly formed a mob to lynch an artist whom they were misled into believing had insulted the honour of the President, but cannot raise so much as a whimper to save the honour of their own children. What a sad state of affairs and a telling indictment on their mentality.

Thank god that Motshekga is not Minister of Higher Education too. We seriously cannot afford to have all forms of education totally fucked up. Unfortunately though, the Higher Education Ministry has another palooka in charge, and he’s busy doing a bang-up job of reducing it to the same pathetic level as Basic Education. But that’s another story…

The biggest laugh in South African politics this year…

Forget the chuckles we had over that Zuma painting saga. Forget the loud guffaws that followed the falling out with Julius Malema, (former) head of the ANC Youth League, and erstwhile bum-chum of Zuma.

Forget every hilarious (albeit tragic) incident involving Jacob Zuma and his bumbling quest to govern South Africa, this year. They all pale in comparison to the latest incident of utter absurdity surrounding the President.

Jacob Zuma, who’s widely known to have had no formal education, has been conferred with an Honorary Professor of International Relations degree by Peking University in China.

Although it’s just a worthless title, the guy is totally undeserving of such an “honour.” He has not achieved anything of significance, both locally and abroad. It’s patently clear that it’s just an astute move on the part of the Chinese to stroke Zuma’s ego, in their pursuit of economic ties with South Africa, which no doubt will be more favorable to them.

The whole affair further sullies the academic world, which is increasingly awarding useless degrees to all sorts of questionable people. However, in the South African context it is a monstrous travesty, considering the Zuma government’s dismal performance in the delivery of Education to the country.

The insult to all the children of South Africa who have been negatively affected by the incompetence of Zuma’s Education Ministry is made all the more unpalatable by this comment by him at his acceptance speech in Beijing:

We are inspired by the value attached to education in the analects of the ancient Chinese philosopher Confucius, who stressed the importance of education and study as being fundamental to human progress.

There are now many in the country who are absolutely convinced that the only progress, Zuma and his ANC cohorts are interested in, is to do with their own self-interest.

One wonders how long it will be before Minister of Education Angie Motshekga, is invited to China to receive her Honorary Doctorate in International Educational Relations…

Imbeciles abound in e-tolling lobby

taxes (Photo credit: 401K)

The plot to defraud the South African public by way of sustained taxation continues…

Because it’s getting more difficult to dip bling-hungry fingers into the cooky jar without being caught, the latest attempt to filch legally by the South African government comes in the guise of e-tolling. This repugnant scheme involves coercing the already over-taxed public into paying criminally exorbitant tolls, to use South Africa’s national roads that have already been built and paid for with the public’s taxes.

When the scheme became public knowledge, the resultant outcry forced the SA government to put it on hold. However the lure of easy money could not be resisted, and they persisted in proceeding with this ruse of self-enrichment, arrogantly buoyed by the knowledge that the ignorant people who had kept them in power for nearly 20 years, would let it slide, like they did with so many other indiscretions by government.

Not this time however. Even the perpetually ignorant could not be forced to buy into this outrageous scheme to part them from their hard-earned money.

So the SA government tried the incentivizing approach by offering discounts to those who registered to hand over their cash willingly. When that did not work, they resorted to blackmail, threatening the public with surcharges for non-registration and punitive costs for late and non-payment, including threats of arrest and incarceration.

In between these extreme measures, government spin doctors such as Jimmy Manyi incredibly tried to convince the unwashed masses that paying the e-tolls was a method of “rolling out democracy.”

Not to be outdone, Nazir Alli of Sanral, the roads agency charged by government to administer this fraud scheme, pleaded with the public:

We appeal to all to obey the laws of our country . I encourage you to register so that you can enjoy these discounts.

This is how, we the public interpret this statement: Please don’t fuck with the laws we created to screw you. If you register, we’ll give you dumb fucks a discount for being such ignorant shits.

Nazir is on par with Manyi for being the biggest morons in South Africa at the moment – only Julius Malema tops that honour.

I have only one thing to say to Nazir and Manyi: Fuck you, your democracy, your toll roads and your government. I ain’t paying one red cent.

Today in Politics: Roasting #01

The ANC celebrated their Centenary yesterday in Free State Province where the organization was formed by more honourable men all those years ago. A lot of money was spent to commemorate 83 years of resisting apartheid and 17 years of modern leaders not being able to resist dipping their hands in the public cookie jar.

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The Reverend Jesse Jackson, an invited guest at the ANC Centenary was in attendance earlier on Saturday together with President Jacob Zuma at a ceremony where a bull was ritually slaughtered. Since the Reverend looked quite happy to be there, one wonders if he was fondly remembering the sermons he once used to deliver about the glory days of the Abrahamic religions as recounted in the Pentateuch.

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While the good Reverend is still here, perhaps he’ll consider starting up a mega-church in South Africa. There’s real good money to be made here, considering that two-thirds of the voting population are willing believers.That could work out perfect for the ANC too for future elections. What better way to deliver more empty promises, than from the pulpit.

………………..

President Jacob Zuma delivered his usual insipid speech that lasted for two hours; luckily most of those present were the kind of people who his [Zuma’s] speech-writers pen this drivel for. As usual, more empty promises were made about how the ANC was going to be “transformed” but fortunately those who actually care about this sort of thing were safely at home, out of the scorching Free State sun, having a glass of wine, watching the FA Cup, or something more entertaining and believable.

……………….

Finally, it seems that although that jackass, Julius Malema was in the same Province during the celebrations, he was not at the actual event itself. There are those who would have preferred him being there, which would have made things slightly more interesting, but I guess the absence of more hot air from this blowhard, was also not such a bad thing after all.

Black Tuesday + 1

As the public venting of anger over the passing of the Protection Of Information Bill [POIB] by the majority ANC-led Parliament spills over into Day 2, it’s become necessary to spit out some of the bitterness that’s clogged up in our mouths.

And so I pondered the curious case of former poster boy for the ANC, one Julius Malema, freshly expelled from the party for certain indiscretions, and now plotting his vengeance from the sidelines. This bozo who enjoyed telling the world he would die and kill for the President, now finds himself at odds with his former idol, and is screaming blue murder.

He refuses to vacate the position of leader of the ANC Youth League that he’s been fired from, and still goes around acting like he’s in charge. And the ANC bigwigs seem powerless to do anything about it.

© 2011 Zapiro (All rights reserved)
Printed with permission from www.zapiro.com
For more Zapiro cartoons visit www.zapiro.com

Which left me wondering how these same morons intend to silence an entire nation with the POIB, while they are so easily held to ransom by one of their own fallen comrades. Herein lies the secret to defying or defeating this insidious piece of legislation, after all legal and peaceful means fails. I think you all know what I’m getting at, and it does not involve marching like idiots to the Union Buildings.

Incidently, Malema may not have an ANC membership card anymore, but he still has that ace up his sleeve – the race card.

The march for economic freedom, or the Juju shuffle up the M1

"picked" from jacarandafm.com

His name is Juju, otherwise known as Julius Malema, and heads up the youth wing of the African National Congress (ANC) – you’ll be amazed how much trouble an empty head can both cause, and get into.

Haven’t heard of him huh? That’s okay. You’re probably not from South Africa, and you have your own problems with scumbag politicians fucking up your own country. Right?

Anyway over here in sunny South Africa, Juju has been in the news far too much recently. His big mouth, and dubious lifestyle has got him into a heap of trouble, most notably with his parent organization the ANC, who also happen to run the country…more or less, mostly less. I’m not so sure if he’s in much trouble with the law. We all suspect [with good reason] that his parent organization owns the law and can make any trouble they’re in, disappear – much like our taxes.

His trouble with the ANC is believed to be because he is at loggerheads with a certain faction within the organization who in turn is at loggerheads with a certain other faction within the rotting carcase that was once headed by Nelson Mandela. We can’t be 100% certain of this, but most knowledgeable people seem to think so.

There was a time when Juju was 100% for the leader of the ruling faction [most South Africans will remember that this was around the time when it was revealed that Juju scored only 20% for woodwork at school]. Since then he’s become a whole lot fatter, and it’s thought that this could be due to all the tenders he’s been scoring for being 100% for the leader. But all that’s changed now and if we follow everything we’re being fed in the news, Juju’s 100% for himself only.

A little while ago, someone [bastard – may the fleas of a thousand camels…] whispered in Juju’s ear that “political freedom is useless without economic freedom” and he interpreted it to mean that all mines should be nationalised, jobs be handed out to the unemployable, and shares on the stock exchange be distributed freely among the people. Since this epiphany, Juju has hung onto this silly dogma like a hungry you know what.

Which leads us to today and this silly march up or alongside the M1, from Johannesburg to the Stock Exchange Building in Sandton. Juju has branded it the “March for Economic Freedom,” although it’s debatable whether he understands anything about the economy or freedom for that matter. Juju is becoming quite the politician – by being very adept at misleading and exploiting the common people.

Those of us who work hard for the pittance we earn, know that this march is all about demanding for shit that you don’t want to work for. It’s just an extension of the culture of entitlement that the ANC has worked very hard to cultivate over nearly two decades in office, while simultaneously fucking up the country. Yes, it’s commonly thought that their biggest achievement in all that time was to learn how to raid the treasury effortlessly, while sidestepping every attempt to hold them accountable.

Yeah, Juju, you know what? No amount of marching or singing or dancing is going to suddenly make jobs appear, mines to become nationalised or shares to be distributed. You may have convinced 5000 [estimated] gullible idiots to shuffle along the M1 to your delusional tune, but all that’s generated so far is howls of laughter.

March on into the Indian Ocean, you pompous numbskull…