Fat heads, fat cats and fat lies

Just when you think our politicians have sunk to the depths of utter depravity, they somehow manage to astound you even further.

This week while browsing through the local newspapers online, it felt as though I was reading The Onion, but you just can’t make this shit up. South African politicians are notorious for their self-indulgent and disdainful behaviour, they’re also pretty reckless when it comes to revealing how utterly inane they are.

Must come naturally; just has to be…

While our President was castigating the media about being unpatriotic for reporting on crime and corruption, telling them how their negativity made him think about fleeing the country, a Premier from the Northern Cape was well into a spending spree, splashing out around R50,000 of taxpayers’ money on fast food. Meanwhile the ANC Deputy Chief Whip in Parliament was regaling the house with tales about how Christians don’t lie.

President Zuma told a bunch of journalism students that on a recent trip to Mexico, he was told that the Mexican press does not report on crime in that country because it was patriotic not to do so, in order for the country to succeed. Seems the President was blissfully unaware of how the Mexican press was self-censoring out of fear, in one of the world’s most dangerous countries. So our President is either gullible or bending the truth to suit his own agenda. I pick, witless.

Another member of this artless bunch of fat cats, Sylvia Lucas was only recently inaugurated as Premier of the Northern Cape, by none other that President Zuma. She however lost no time in getting to grips with taxpayers’ money… by blowing it on junk food. A spokesperson from her department left reporters with this gem:

How would we have eaten if we didn’t use taxpayers’ money?

And to round things off, Chief Whip Doris Dlakude, another passenger on President Zuma’s gravy train, was quite nonchalant about dodging the responsibility of scheduling a critical debate in Parliament by revealing a sacred truth; that Christians don’t lie:

We are Christians here, we are not going to lie to anyone. We are still committing to this debate, it will see the light of day.

And that wraps up another week in the lives of our hysterical politicians. Off course, there’s much more to come; it’s a given.