In response to a bigoted Christian politician…

It’s not often that men of the cloth admit to the follies of the Church and religious scripture. But when such a man does speak out against the crass wrongs perpetrated on society by the religious or political establishment, he deserves praise, not condemnation.

So you can imagine my consternation at reading this disgusting letter by one Thamsanqa Enoch Bam in an online publication, in response to Archbishop Desmond Tutu who spoke out against the vile and draconian anti-gay bill being proposed in Uganda. Tutu earned the ire of Bam by likening the hateful legislation to South Africa’s apartheid laws.

Bam, who also proclaims himself as the President of the People’s Party (a recent addition to the absurdly long list of insignificant South African political parties), asserts that the Archbishop was “going against” God’s Laws by condoning homosexuality. His conviction, unsurprisingly comes from the bible and is backed up by the quotation of a few hand-picked scriptures which I won’t repeat, such is my revulsion.

Is there a more revolting blend than a politician and a religionist?

Bam asks how the Archbishop could miss such clear scripture [referring to the revolting quotations I earlier sidestepped like a pile of steaming horeshit]. Off course, we would not be allowed the courtesy of asking how this cretin [Bam, and others of his ilk] misses with unerring conviction, all the other contradictory and hateful biblical scriptures that don’t confirm his/their prejudices.

This letter in the Times Live appears to be an extract from a lengthier blog he wrote, which also condemns gay marriage, and confoundingly professes support for the dreadful ANC [ruling party], if they “made an about turn and ended their duplicity, corruption, mismanagement and disregard of the poor masses.” And to add further insult, he concludes that the ANC’s manifest incompetence would be solved if the “country goes back to God.”

And like all fundamentalists he is off course intimate with God’s will:

As a Christian, I pray that gays and lesbians will eventually see their folly, repent, and turn away from their abominations. That is the will of God.

What a slimeball? The will of this atheist is that you change the name of your political party to Asshole’s Party, because you will never represent the people, just bigoted assholes like yourself.

A nation of sheep will beget a government of wolves

A nation of sheep will beget a government of wolves. – Edward R Murrow


© 2012 Zapiro (All rights reserved)
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Farewell Ravi Shankar (1920 – 2012)

Ravi Shankar was a musical genius with instrument of choice, the sitar. The world loses another gifted musician, but through his daughters Anoushka and Norah Jones, his genius will live on.

Here he will be remembered for imparting the gift of musical knowledge to Anoushka.

Why I don’t tweet

Yesterday, a very dear friend of mine posted on Facebook that I am very opinionated, and so she would like to see me on Twitter.


Well, I do have an opinion on almost everything, so I guess I am opinionated, but hopefully amusingly so. However, here’s why I don’t think I could ever subscribe to Twitter:

  1. 140 characters are hardly enough to express oneself meaningfully. Yes, I like to waffle.
  2. Twitter encourages the texting of internet slang which has become all too pervasive, infecting even those who have been taught proper written language. I’m kinda anal about language and grammar.
  3. Tweets were meant to be composed on portable devices like cellular phones. I hate those things because I really struggle to type on them, whether they have keys or a touch interface. I don’t have fat fingers, just thin patience.
  4. Facebook is already one social network too many. Twitter would be like the third wheel.
  5. The Tweetosphere is already filled with too much noise. I really don’t care what you had for breakfast, nor do I suspect do you care that I’m stuck in traffic.
  6. The pressure to post something to keep your followers interested invariably leads to more noise. I already have that pressure with this blog, and don’t wish to add to it.

Off course I suppose there are benefits, but you can just as well drop me an email to let me know what they are…

Karlology: What I’ve Learned So Far by Karl Pilkington

karlologyHaving already come across Karl Pilkington on the television series An Idiot Abroad, which also featured Ricky Gervais, I bought Karlology looking forward to some more of that sort of humour. It did not disappoint.

In the television series, Karl is portrayed as a simpleton, your average village idiot. His writing style in the book continues that trend as we are taken on a tour around England to the History Museum, The London Aquarium, The London Zoo, The Science Museum, various exhibitions and The Library among other places, with Karl musing about each in his own amusing way.

We are however frequently taken on a tangent in his thought processes which turn out to be quite hilarious usually, if a bit daft. From pretty early on, you realise that none of it is meant to be taken seriously; it’s just a little light reading and very funny in parts too.

This is the third book in the Karl Pilkington bibliography, but he has written a further two. I will have to make a point of finding and reading at least some of the others, if not all.

The best way to truly appreciate the idiotic brilliance of Karlology, is through some of the really funny quotes from the book:


You’ve got people who can tel where dinosaurs walked on Earth and what they ha for their last meal 65 million years ago, and yet the doughnut who works at the service company in charge of our flat can’t tell me whether our windows are gonna get cleaned in the next month.

The way I see it, there’s no rush to read the classics as they’ll always be around. I might read one when I’m older. If I do, they’ll be even more classic by then.

Saucers are another thing that clutters up the house. We got a load of them with our plate set but we never use them. We never used saucers when I was a kid either – they always ended getting used to feed the cat off. We ain’t got a cat now so we could get shut of them, but Suzanne won’t get rid “just in case” we get a cat in the future.

That’s the odd thing with fish: we like t look at them and keep them as pets, but we also like to eat them – yet we moan about Koreans who do the same with their pet dogs.

I think the real reason that sea levels are rising is that there’s too many fish in the sea. Jesus didn’t use up enough of the fish when he had the chance. If he’d given everyone around five fish, the sea level would have dropped.

I must admit though, it does annoy me how they always bury people in nice quiet areas. I live on a really noisy road and have problems sleeping cos of the racket, and yet the dead get a lovely peaceful park.

It doesn’t bother me being bald. I’d have the cure if Suzanne wanted me to have hair again, cos I feel like I’ve conned her as I had hair when she me. Mind you, her arse is now bigger than when I met her, so I suppose we’ve both been done.

Is your President as contemptible as ours?

I felt rather vomitus today after digesting yet more revelations about our scandalous President in the media.

I think we’ve become immune to the daily exposés about President Jacob Zuma’s depraved life, because they usually come in small doses. I think South Africans are beyond being shocked and disgusted by his loathsome behaviour. We’re just exhausted learning about every nasty bit of larcenous, incompetent and immoral deed he’s done since taking office.


Off course it all started before he took office. And today’s revelations touch on some of these, and so much more. So much more…

Auditors KPMG have compiled a 500-page report on the alleged acts of corruption that Zuma has been involved in dating back to 2006. Follow all the links provided on this news article posted in the online version of the Mail & Guardian.

What many South Africans are disgusted with though, is the apparent impotence of the various arms of the law and justice system to do anything about it. Even more galling is the prospect of living another 5 years under the (mis)rule of this miscreant. By all accounts he’s clearly manipulated his way (with acts of violence in some reported cases) into securing the vote to remain head of the ANC, which in effect guarantees him the Presidency at the next elections. Unless off course the masses who vote for the ANC with crass predictability, have a sudden rush of comprehension (by whatever miracle), and vote for Opposition Parties.

In light of the above, the rather candid admission by a senior ANC official that ordinary ANC members are mere “voting cattle” whose main purpose seems to be to keep the elite in power, is even more infuriating. However, this is perhaps the most honest thing we’ve heard from the ANC in many years, but is very disturbing all the same.

Looks like troubled times ahead for South Africa. Is there a Banana Republic on the horison?

17 Shopping Days Until the End of the World… Again!


It’s silly season again! No really, this time it most certainly is…

I wrote last year in October about the religious nut, Harold Camping who predicted the end of the world on 21 October. This time around its various New Ageists and other assorted crackpots. Most of these wacko’s base their beliefs on the Mayan calendar. Others think that Earth is going to collide with a Black Hole, or the imaginary planet Nibiru. Some even suggest we’re going to be invaded by Aliens.

I know the world is still as crazy as ever; probably even more so than last year. There are all the usual signs. We’ve had them here in South Africa too. Religious nut jobs are still butchering anyone who they deem to be in opposition to their primitive belief systems. Politicians are still defrauding their constituencies with gay abandon. And every freak, thief, rapist and murderer continues to treat the world as their personal property.

And global temperatures are rising.

But I can assure you that I will stop the world from ending on 21 December 2012. The question is, will you worship me thereafter?